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Location: Long Beach, California, United States

Music Geek - Rock & Roll Jeopardy Champ Certified!

Poop Culture

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Thursday, May 31, 2007

Save a Pimp!

Word is going 'round that "Spike", aka "Herbert Lester", will not be joining the rest of the cast of Passions as the campy soap makes its move from NBC to DirecTV this fall.

This cannot stand. Spike is more than just Harmony's resident sleazeball and go-to person when you want a dirty deed done. Spike is the voice and conscience of the Passions viewer, providing the show with plenty of fourth-wall breaking commentary on how stupid the other characters and show situations are. He's also one of the few actors on the show capable of selling the funny. Let's do a quick rundown of what Spike has done for Harmony:

• Provided a bar for Harmony's underage partiers to get shitfaced
• Pimped out former goody-goody and Marc Cosmetics saleswoman Jessica Bennet after getting her hooked on pills
• Married said Jessica to prevent her from testifying against him in court
• Knocked up said Jessica in order to sell her baby on the black market! ("...twice as much if the eyes stay blue!")
• Murdered many of Jessica's johns behind her back, then made her think she did it
• Provided many Harmony locals with the muscle they needed to get their dirty deeds done (Alistair, Julian, even Sheridan)
• Shot show matriarch Pilar Lopez-Fitzgerald in an attempt to finally give her character a storyline (quickly abandoned/never resolved)
• Involved in countless fistfights with Noah Bennet, Ethan Winthrop, Sam Bennet, Chris Boothe, yet never won a single one.

Look, just Save Spike!


Fine Folks

"...and by hubris, I mean overweening pride!" - Johnny's Greatest Hits

25 Year Loop
Fucking Woof
David Live
The Night Before
Jobriath Was First
She's in Parties
She's in Parties Pt. 2
Tales From the Dragon Club
Tales From the Dragon Club Pt. 2
Okay, California...You Win
How to Sell Used CDs

Previously on "Johnny Is a Man"...

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