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Location: Long Beach, California, United States

Music Geek - Rock & Roll Jeopardy Champ Certified!

Poop Culture

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Friday, April 09, 2004

A nice breeze blows in/Whenever the big fella cracks a grin
Why have I been obsessed with Burning Sensations' "Belly of the Whale" for four days now? It's on "Living In Oblivion Vol. 4". Yell at me later for putting it in your head.


Sigh. Seriously, I can barely type. What the fuck? My blood pressure is really gonna love this.

So, Friendster. Let's dish Friendster, shall we? Sure. In theory, not a bad idea. Network amongst your inner circle, see inside their inner circles, meet other people, etc. And of course, the infusion of homos has turned it into yet another online tricking service (seriously, don't we have enough?

Have you ever gotten Friendster Add Requests from complete, total strangers who want nothing more from you than to use you to rack up their Friendster odometer? Bizarre.

We interrupt this meaningless ramble to bring you Breaking Easter Weekend News
ATLANTA - About 100 men and women gathered outside Atlanta's Roman Catholic cathedral Thursday to protest the archbishop's exclusion of women from the Holy Thursday foot-washing ritual.
We now return to our program, already in progress

Huh? What the--? Just read that news story again and remind yourself it's 2004. Jesus Christ, pun intended.

So, Friendster. Good things: It's put me in touch with quite a few people I've lost contact with over the years, most recently (today, even) Richard, aka SDavenport from my old posting days. Ahhhh, the mid-90s, when the web was new, Morrissey was over and we all took solace at that web refuge.

Morrissey. New single out May 4. New album out May 18. New material I've heard is actually pretty good. Can the old girl do it? With a song called "All the Lazy Dykes", I had hope for the first time in a decade.

Thursday, April 08, 2004

I watched "The Swan" last night. Was making these women look like drag queens the goal? If so, mission accomplished.

I feel dirty.

Wednesday, April 07, 2004

Fucking Woof
I suppose I need to face it. I'm BearBait. BearBait am I. I have the latent mutant power to attract stocky, hairy white guys. I can't say I really blame them for thinking I'm a "cub". I mean, let's go down the checklist:

• Shaved head? Check.
• Hairy chest? Check.
• Some form of facial hair (at least I don't have the ubiquitous goatee)? Check.
• Propensity to end up in such bear hangouts as "The Hole", "Mineshaft" and "Faultline", usually dragged there against my will by bear-loving friends? Check.

Now luckily, I've been able to use my "muscle bear" (ick) status to some degree of success in finding men I'm attracted to, so I can't really complain. In fact, to complain that any type of person in general finds you attractive is kind of disgusting and petty in the first place. I just wish there was a bit more originality involved in the whole scene. You can filter the entire "bear community" to one word:


"Woof." Fucking woof. Yeesh. Grown men have said this to me. Perfect strangers in their thirties and forties have shambled up to me in bars, and leaning into my face so closely I could taste the beer off their tongues, have looked into my boobs and said "woof".

Whatever happened to a simple "Hey", or "Hello"? "Woof." Again, yeesh. I have a message for all bears, cubs, beavers, otters and manatees -- STOP SAYING "WOOF". It makes you look juvenile, infantile and inarticulate. Which, granted, can be totally hot on some people. But in my case, the "woof" word sends a shiver down my spine, and not the good ones that end in erections. If anything, it's a penis softener.

NO MORE FUCKING "WOOFS". I mean it, bitches.


TAMPA, Fla. -- The owner of a jewelry kiosk at a mall in Tampa, who wears an Islamic head scarf, said she was physically and verbally assaulted by three people who told her to "get out of (America)" and said her religion is "hateful and violent."

Yeah, they're hateful and violent. KILL 'EM!

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

From E!online:

AS IF SHE NEEDED IT: Jennifer Lopez's mother, Guadalupe Lopez, winning a $2.4 million jackpot while playing $1 slots at Atlantic City, People reports.

Fucking Christ.

Fine Folks

"...and by hubris, I mean overweening pride!" - Johnny's Greatest Hits

25 Year Loop
Fucking Woof
David Live
The Night Before
Jobriath Was First
She's in Parties
She's in Parties Pt. 2
Tales From the Dragon Club
Tales From the Dragon Club Pt. 2
Okay, California...You Win
How to Sell Used CDs

Previously on "Johnny Is a Man"...

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